“It has been said that something as small as the flutter of a butterfly’s wing can ultimately cause a typhoon halfway around the world.”
—Edward Lorenz
Being a teacher or a coach or a mentor is such a challenging vocation. There are days when I feel like I’m not having any impact at all. Days when I wonder if I’m any good at this or if I’m supposed to be doing something else. Recently, those doubts have been louder than usual. I’ve been worried that I’m putting too much into the world that no one cares about, or that maybe my message doesn’t have value.
And then I get a phone call from a young man I honestly thought I might have lost — a young man who is beginning to learn who he is and who he wants to become.
Almost two years ago, Alex’s mom reached out and said, “Matt, I saw your book on Amazon… I think you’re who we’ve been looking for to help our son’s future.” It felt like a fluke at the time — a family in North Carolina finding someone in Colorado with zero mutual connections. But flukes often end up being signs. They become small moments that matter far more than we realize.
In my world, that’s the butterfly effect: a tiny moment, a simple action, a small conversation that ends up creating a much bigger shift down the road — like the flapping of a single butterfly’s wings eventually contributing to a tsunami thousands of miles away. You don’t see the impact immediately, but you feel it eventually.
Watching Alex Transform
When I first met Alex, he was a ball of passion. His mind moved fast. He held onto ideas with everything in him. His dream back then was college basketball. He worked relentlessly and wanted his coaches to see his character, his drive, his heart. But over the years, people who could have nurtured his love for the game ended up dimming it instead.
As he started his senior year this fall, I worried about him. His confidence wasn’t the same. His identity felt uncertain. And for a while, I feared I hadn’t gotten through to him. I worried he had given up on me — and worse, that maybe he had given up on himself.
But what I didn’t understand then is something he is teaching me now: he wasn’t lost; he was transforming. He needed space and time. He needed room to crawl into his cocoon and figure out who he truly was deep inside.
And now, I get to see him emerge.
Alex is finding his faith — not in a building, but in how he chooses to live. He’s realizing that faith is much more than going to church on Sundays. It’s not confined to brick and mortar; it’s reflected in how he serves, how he treats people, and how he carries himself.
He shows up where he’s needed.
He’s discovering that his education is a portal to his future — not something he has to do, but something he wants to do.
He’s learning the power of books and the doors that open when you read.
He’s discovering mentors and inspiration in boxing — people who push him, guide him, and help him see his own strength.
He’s learning to lead, to listen, to motivate, to inspire.
What He’s Teaching Me
And as he grows, I’m growing too.
Our roles are shifting. I used to think I was the one teaching him. Now I’m realizing he is teaching me. He is showing me patience, and he is showing me trust. He is teaching me that growth rarely looks the way we expect it to. He is showing me that stepping back isn’t giving up — sometimes it’s just getting a bigger running start to make a great leap forward.
This is just his beginning. He is only scratching the surface of who he is becoming. And I’m grateful — deeply grateful — that I get to be a small part of his journey. I can’t wait to see the great effect his wings will have on this world.
A Reminder for Every Parent and Coach
If you’re a parent, a coach, a mentor, or someone who cares deeply about the young people in your life, I hope Alex’s story reminds you of what I’m still learning every day: growth doesn’t always look the way we expect it to. Sometimes it goes quiet for a while. Sometimes it hides. Sometimes it cocoons. And sometimes, when the timing is right, it emerges more beautiful and more resilient than we imagined.
If you want more stories, tools, and conversations about helping young people become confident, grounded, purpose-driven adults, you can always find me at CoachMattRogers.com. That’s where I share weekly blogs, podcasts, and resources for families, coaches, and athletes walking this same journey.
