“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom” -Aristotle
I love teenagers. I really do. They’re in the best and blurriest years of their lives—trying things for the first time, taking chances, pushing limits, and figuring out who they are when no one’s watching.
They’re often convinced they’ve already reached their peak in ability, knowledge, confidence, and courage… until life forces them to look up and realize they’re standing at the base of a mountain, not the summit. That’s when the reality check hits—and it hits hard.
Parents, Try This Test
If your child believes they’re a “recruitable” athlete—but they can’t understand why Power 5 coaches aren’t lined up outside your front door with flowers, candy, and NIL deals—let’s bring them back to earth for a moment.
Take them to the biggest mirror in your house. Have them look themselves in the eye and answer these eight questions honestly:
- Are you as big or bigger than the average recruit [at your position in your sport]?
- Are you stronger and more athletic than the average recruit?
- Are you quicker and faster (yes, those are two different things) than the average recruit?
- Do you train harder and with more consistent routines than the average recruit?
- Are your skills tighter, sharper, and more refined than the average recruit?
- Are you as good—or better—as a teammate than the average recruit?
- Are you as coachable, or more coachable, than the average recruit?
- Do you love your sport so much that you’d play anywhere, overcome anything, and do it with gratitude and determination?
If the answer to any of those questions is “no” or “maybe,” then you’re likely below average as a recruit—and that’s okay, as long as you understand that honesty is your starting point.
If you can confidently answer “yes” to all eight, congratulations—you’re at least an average recruit. That means some coaches will want to evaluate you. Maybe five out of every hundred. Ten out of a hundred is great. Twenty out of a hundred means you’re special.
The Harsh Math of Recruiting
Every day you forget to improve in one of those eight areas is a day you become less recruitable. That’s the math no one likes to talk about.
This is hard, folks. Don’t take for granted any moment when a single coach likes you, believes in you, and wants to learn more about you. If one coach wants to recruit you, that’s the exact moment your recruiting journey has truly begun—and you should be thankful that you’ve done enough to make that happen.
That doesn’t mean you have to commit to that coach. It doesn’t mean that school is the perfect fit.
It does mean your work has only just begun—because that one coach could disappear tomorrow when they find someone who’s bigger, stronger, quicker, faster, smarter, more humble, or with better grades. At that point, you’ll have zero coaches recruiting you.
That’s not meant to discourage you—it’s meant to motivate you. Every time a coach shows interest, your responsibility is to build on it, not coast on it. Recruiting isn’t about getting attention; it’s about sustaining it through consistent growth and relentless effort.
So What Now?
Stop the pity parties. Stop giving yourself days off from your “days off.” Decide how badly you want this—and then back it up with action.
The athletes who make it aren’t the ones who get discovered; they’re the ones who stay discovered by constantly improving, staying humble, and refusing to let one good moment define their ceiling or one bad moment define their floor.
The truth is, the reality of recruiting will always be blurry until you’re willing to see yourself clearly in that mirror. That’s where every real journey begins—with honesty, humility, and hunger.
If this message hits home—whether you’re a parent, coach, or athlete—there are more resources waiting for you at CoachMattRogers.com.
You’ll find weekly blogs, podcast interviews with college coaches, free recruiting and coaching tips, and tools like Significant Recruiting: The Playbook for Prospective College Athletes to help you see your journey with greater clarity and confidence.
