“Shut up. Suit up. Show up.” – Dr. James Hollis
When professor and author, Dr. James Hollis published his book, What Matters Most, Oliver Burkeman of The Guardian noted that “the one-star Amazon reviews of his books [are] full of people furious at his refusal to offer cheery reassurance or a one-size-fits-all recipe for happiness.”
Recently, I watched an interview where Hollis leaned into that same refusal and dropped the quote above. It made me smile—the smile of an old coach who believes we’re far too quick to patronize today’s youth, and not nearly quick enough to tell them the truth. Or, as my father would’ve said, to give a little tough love.
The Mantra for Pre-Adulthood
I love working with teenagers. They can drive me crazy and test every ounce of my patience, but I am grateful for every opportunity to help them anchor a mantra like this one.
I shared the quote on social media with the line: “Look closely at these words. Only a small percentage of student-athletes will see motivation.” Sadly, most read those six words as persecution or a lack of compassion.
But here’s the truth: sometimes we all need to be told it’s time to put on our big boy or big girl pants and get to work—to dig deep enough to push past rejection, failure, and unrealistic expectations.
Why So Few Make It
Being a student is hard. Being a student-athlete is harder. Being a college student-athlete? For most kids, it feels impossible.
That’s why only about 7% of high school athletes will ever don a college jersey. It’s not about being the most talented. It’s about being the one who shows up consistently—who makes shut up, suit up, and show up their daily routine.
Two Kinds of Recruits
When I have an initial recruiting strategy session with new families, I often find myself talking student-athletes and parents out of pursuing college athletics. I spell out the early mornings, the two-a-days, the strength and conditioning sessions, the road trips, the study hours, the mental, physical and financial cost. I paint the picture as honestly as possible because if it makes them quit, they most likely didn’t love it enough to begin with.
And yet—every so often, I get a call back within days from a kid who says:
“Coach, I don’t need time to think about it. No one is taking this game from me. I love it. I can’t live without it. I won’t give it up no matter how overwhelming you make it sound. Let’s get to work.”
It’s the kids who come back excited that I choose to work with. The first may have loved the game once, but not enough to sacrifice for it. The second? They’ll fight for it to the end. Don’t get me wrong…I understand the reality of both of these kids, and I have compassion and pride in both. It takes a lot of courage to say “I don’t think I have it in me anymore. I’m interested and passionate about other things.”
However, at the end of the day, recruits tend to fall into one of two categories:
- Recruit A: Offended by the words. Done in by the grind.
- Recruit B: Energized by the challenge. Refuses to quit.
Recruit A rarely makes it to the finish line. Recruit B may not either—but if they don’t, it won’t have anything to with their love of the game or the resilience and determination in their heart. It will usually be something completely out of their control…like a career-ending injury.
Which Are You?
Be honest with yourself. When you read “Shut up. Suit up. Show up.”—were you offended? If so, you’re probably Recruit A.
But if your first thought was “Hell no, that fired me up—bring it all on,” then you’ve got the mindset of Recruit B.
The question isn’t whether the words are too harsh. The question is whether they light a fire in you—or expose that your fire has already gone out.
If this hit home, I encourage you to check out more resources at CoachMattRogers.com. You’ll find my book Significant Recruiting: The Playbook for Prospective College Athletes and the new Recruit’s Journal series—tools built to keep you focused, organized, and ready to show up for what matters most.
